During the twenty-seven years that I practiced law, I used to get incredibly introspective as my birthdays approached. I often got a bit depressed. It wasn’t an age thing, but more of a sadness at what I hadn’t accomplished as yet another year passed.
I have some pretty incredible examples of over-achievers in my family. My grandfather had a long political career, motivated by his desire to change the world for the better. And he did.
My dad was successful in business, and yet the incredible achievement in his life, in my eyes – and also probably his, is his marriage to my mom. They have always been the example of true love in my life. Their marriage of fifty-nine years has been one of kindness, compassion and compromise. And they raised two children with the same ethics and consideration for others.
I held myself to these standards in the different areas of my life, and I came up short.
My fifty-fourth birthday is rapidly approaching. The introspection has begun.
I look at the last two years: a major move after living in the same place for 23 years, retirement from my profession and identity, marriage – and all that a new relationship/status/living situation brings with it, moving my parents, Covid, some health issues – for myself and my family, a storm of the century, and friends dealing with huge tragedies.
I am incredibly proud of myself. It took strength to navigate through these years. I can say without hesitation that I have never worked harder in my life.
I am also overwhelmed with gratitude. The blessings that I have … the people in my life … the love in my life … the strength in the relationships that I have built over these last two years, with first and foremost, my marriage. I am so fortunate, and I recognize that.
As I approach this birthday, I am no longer in the career that I thought defined me. I no longer live in the incredible marshes of Skidaway Island in Savannah, although those marshes will live in me forever.
And yet, I feel lightness, joy and peace. At (soon-to-be) fifty-four, I am strong and capable. I feel incredibly comfortable in my skin. I am blessed and I am grateful.
Finally, I feel like celebrating.
4 comments
Beautifully stated Lee Ann! Always proud of you!
Faye (I will always think of you as Miss Ryan) – that I make you proud makes me feel so good! You were a kind and loving influence on my life!
Beautifully written assessment of the last 2 years of your life. I do remember in the past on your birthday, getting very reflective. Never sell yourself short saying you came up short in accomplishments. You are as much of an over achiever as the other members of your family and maybe more so if one looks at things through another perspective or a different lenses. Yes, you are a incredibly HARD worker and I’m sure you always have been to accomplish the amazing things you’ve done in your life. As you wrote about your last 2 years, that in itself most people could’ve have never done. I’m sorry to hear about health issues with both you and your parents. Your parents I understand but you I never thought. You look like the picture of perfect health and I know you work hard at that too. Please know for all you are and all you HAVE accomplished, you make most of us look like “slugs”. Please know how very happy I am for you that you met all the incredible challenges over the past 2 years which have paid off with a wonderful new family. You deserve every bit of happiness you feel yet you always remain humble and full of gratitude. You come from an extremely wonderful family (good stock) and I know you have made all of them very proud, the ones still with you and the ones who have gone before you. Just in case I miss your birthday because at times I go days w/o getting on FB, please know I wish you the happiest 54th ever Tunie.! My heartfelt thanks to you always for the kindness, time and compassion you showed me during the most difficult time in my life. As I’ve said before, I’ve always felt to have met you and to have become one of your many friends, was an honor. Love You and Happy Birthday!!! Your friend always! Pam
Pam – you are one of the most kind, loving, and giving people I know! Our friendship has been such a gift to me. Thank you for the kind words! I love you!
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